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A few years ago, I started a tradition with my dad. It started with him, really. Every Christmas, he’d send me a letter about how my achievements and accomplishments for the year made him proud, made him glad that I was his son. I thought it only fair that I respond in kind on Father’s Day with a letter telling him how much he’s influenced my life, my parenting skills and me, as a human being. I think it’s much better than a Hallmark card.
Dear Dad,
This year on Father’s Day, I want to thank you yet again for the values you instilled in me while I was growing up. You taught me what it means to be a good provider, a wise council and an ear to bend or shoulder to lean on. As my own kids get older, I know the difficulty in doing those things. In not meddling, in listening and not always trying to solve someone else’s problems for them, rather to let them come to the right conclusion on their own. That’s tough. I’m not sure how you did it.
The instillation of the whole “Family First” thought process is one that I’ve struggled, especially over the last few years, to come to grips with. Having been single for so long, it’s often difficult to put others first. I have a real problem with that sometimes. When I dwell on this issue, I tend to think of the way you handled things while I was a child, then teenager, then adult. Giving me advice instead of orders, guidance instead of rules, an ear instead of leaving me to solve issues on my own. Always there. Always supportive. Always giving.
Perhaps just being that sounding board, listening as I talked, was what I valued most, especially as a young man and into adulthood. (As a teenager, I didn’t appreciate anything, but I was a teenager, what do you expect?) Thank you for being all that. Thank you for listening to me, and knowing intuitively what was important to me. Thank you for knowing me, better than I even knew myself.
This Father’s day, I want you to know that you did it. You raised me as a caring, self-reliant individual. When it comes to my own parenting, my own relationship with my kids, I owe you a debt of gratitude that I don’t think I can ever fully convey with words. So I’ll just try to be the best dad, husband, and son, that I can. Just like you.
I love you, Pop. Happy Father’s Day.
